Pull of the tide

Last weekend I was feeling the effects of the tension that was around the village. It was all due to changes with the restrictions for this current lockdown.

I have a tendency to absorb other peoples emotions. I tend to absorb the tension within rooms when I enter them. So, I think the build up of the uncertainty and the realisation that we are in December, it is coming towards the end of the year. It has been a year that has been hard for many. I really enjoyed the extra time, these lockdowns have given me. The extra time with my children, the extended time when they were off school. It’s giving me time to stop and reflect on what is the more important aspects of my life. To see what’s important, to see what I want to do going forward and I really appreciate that. I also, have to admit, I am completely and utterly socially awkward, I’m hoping that other people will now be socially awkward, so I don’t stand out so much.

In fact I think that’s what was getting to me, slightly, the prospect of potential meetups with other people, actual people, face to face, not chatting on text messages or online via communications such as WhatsApp or Messenger but actually face to face, where they can see you and read you like a book.

Unfortunately or Fortunately, depending on how you look at it, I am an individual that will wear her heart on her sleeve. You will know if I do not agree with what you’re saying or I feel uncomfortable or I really want to just leave the building. So, I think there was a whole load of emotions and tensions building up before the weekend, so I decided even before Saturday came along that I was going to go to the beach, there is something completely magical and completely grounding about watching the ocean. Seeing the waves crash against the shore. Just that peacefulness, obviously the ocean can be absolutely terrifying in a storm it’s can be ferocious, scary and harsh but Saturday it was calm.

It was just what I needed. I actually went into the sea as well, it is December, it was flipping freezing but I went in. It was magical, it was lovely and I absolutely loved every minute of just watching those waves crash onto the shore, the joy in the children that were playing and just the calm of the water. There were people canoeing in the sea, there were people open water swimming, in December, that’s hardcore. There were people fishing, it was just so nice just to have my little spot, sat there watching the waves come in and out. It was high tide so it was going further and further away which is probably why it was so calming and it just helped to press that reset button.

It has done so much good to have that time away from the house, from the restrictions, from the confinement the house. To just be able to switch off, unwind, not think about anything and you know what today I have done so many tasks. I’ve completed things that I’ve been putting off for months and months because I either forgot, as I was rushing around doing 20 other things at once or I was just putting it to one side and thinking I’ll do that later and then later never came. I have ticked off some big things on my To Do List today like the Self Assessment, which doesn’t have to be until the end of January but I’ve done it now. I have also updated my website, I have added a shop to the website. I’ve actually also applied for new driving licence which again I have been putting off for ages, thinking it doesn’t matter, it doesn’t matter and then, today, I’m like ‘of course it matters, you need to update your address’

So I think the main thing from this weekend, is to allow yourself time to unwind, to reflect, it’s not about going all steam ahead, all the time. We can slow down, we can take in our environment, we should get grounded and then we can move forward. Be more focused, be more productive. It’s so important to have time out. I’m going to do it more often. I used to go to the beach at least once a month and then, Covid happened. It is definitely going to be a once a month, at least visit again The beach is a must on my holistic healing journey. Everyone should have a beach spot, to go and think, recharge, realign, be present, to move forward.

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